Perspective and Preservation

Posted on Mon Aug 22nd, 2022 @ 5:21pm by Lieutenant Sovas Nyseth & Lieutenant JG Andrea Carrington

Mission: S1 Episode 3: Phage
Location: Corridors of the ship
Timeline: Mission Day 3 at 1600
2309 words - 4.6 OF Standard Post Measure

Sovas was finding the recent developments of his pre-mature Pon Farr to be troubling to say the least and he had been doing his best to keep a handle on the urges when they arose. Granted he couldn't isolate himself from the entirety of the crew, even if being near other males caused his blood to boil and all he wanted to do was attack and savage them for merely being in his presence. On the flip side when he was near any of the female members of the crew he found the urge to mate was just as strong as his urge to fight and dominate any other males, sometimes even stronger which was causing him some concern given that with Pon Farr there wasn't one urge that was necessarily stronger than the other. It was a matter of making a choice, violence or sex.

Though he supposed that he didn't have the best guidance when it came to his Pon Farr given that his father had made him face off in against one of his gladiators to each his son that to embrace the desire to mate during Pon Farr was a weakness of his alien blood and that only violence and bloodletting was the most appropriate course of action. Again, he was conflicted because his both had presented it as a choice to be made and that to take a mate was never a weakness, merely a different path.

He sighed and found himself feeling the tension of his building emotions and the irrationality that was part of the plak tow distracting him has he stepped off the lift and directly into another person. He wheeled about, his anger spike as he closed his hand into fist ready to strike whomever had the audacity to run into him when he stopped at seeing Ensign Monroe. His expression feel as his body trembled and he felt the presence in his mind seeming to take pleasure in shift it host from a state of rage to one of animalistic lust.

It took Sovas a long moment to not merely growl at her as he swallowed, breathing hard as his eyes narrowed as he did his level best to not. "You need to stay out of the way Ensign, don't block the lift door next time."

Andrea gazed at Sovas with concern, she was picking up on what he was feeling. “I came to talk to you Sir, about what happened in the cargo bay.”

His eyes narrowed as again his his gaze moved over her body in much the same way he had been looking at Madeline previously. "What does it matter to you?" He voice was hard and even though the passenger in his mind was pushing him towards more carnal pursuits, that still didn't preclude violence. "The matter has been settled.

"Has it?" Andrea noticed the look that Sovas was giving her. "Then why are you looking at me like I'm a prime piece of meat that you'd love to sink your teeth into?"

"Maybe its because you ran into me." He growled at her again as the urging of the entity pushed him towards her, a female, to explore the less violent side of what he was experiencing. With effort he turned away from the woman as he began to stalk down the corridor trying to reassert control as over his...own self given that he didn't trust himself to not do something stupid.

“Lieutenant...wait!” Andrea followed at a safe distance, she knew how strong Vulcans were, even half Vulcans. “You need help, perhaps it would be advisable to visit Sickbay?”

Sovas felt his mood starting to shift from arousal to irritation and bordering on dangerous anger as he growled menacingly, turning to face the woman pursuing him. "Why does everyone keep telling me that? What use are they going to be? I know how to handle this."

Indeed he did know how to handle it.

At least he had thought he'd known how to handle it. He'd already gone to the holodeck and loaded up his personal Kal-if-fee program, the one that he'd programmed himself using parameters that he felt would be appropriate to the Passion Fight. He had fought through the gamut of opponents until he'd barely been able to drag himself back to his quarters he was so exhausted. It still hadn't resolved the problem for him as he glared at Andrea while his feelings swayed between seething anger or gnawing desire.

He needed to go to Sickbay, there logically wasn't any reason for him not to at this point since everyone knew he was compromised, suffering in someway even if they didn't know the exact details. He was surprised that one of the more ambitious members of his department hadn't tried to take advantage of this.

Andrea approached cautiously. “Lieutenant, let me help you. I already stated that I am no threat to you, others may be different. I know Vulcans can be dangerous, but I don’t think you’d allow yourself to harm me.” At least she hoped not as she got a little closer.

The half evil can't eyes narrowed into dangerous slits as she made an unfounded presumption against him. At least unfounded for her since they had just met one another a handful of days ago, Sovas did not idly engage in violence, yes he fought against the enemies of the Empire, but he didn't engage in it for amusement or the simple pleasure of harming another. Violence to him was a tool to ensure ones survival and harming Andrea did not enhance his ability to survive.

He closed the distance between them and looked down to her eyes as he pressed her back to the wall of the corridor. "You have told me that already, but what benefit do you gain from helping me? I don't engage myself in others feuds or vendettas lest I have good reason too."

He leaned in and close, his voice a low growl as he held her gaze. "What is your benefit?"

Andrea looked at Solvas wide eyed. “My...benefit?” She took a deep breath. “I...earn your trust! That’s all...nothing more!”

His eyes narrowed, his gray eyes hard as slate and as dark as the clouds of a thunderstorm before finally seeming to relent as he backed away from the human woman. His jaw flexed as he let out a slow, deep breath before looking back to her. He was still wrestling n with the heightened and agitated state but it seemed to be receding for the moment at least as he motioned with his head "Walk with me."

Andrea breathed a sigh of relief and nodded. “Yes Sir” she walked alongside him but at a respectful distance. “I didn’t mean to annoy you, I would rather you as my superior officer than some others. In your current condition you are open to attack, I would rather not see that happen.”

"Don't call me sir, I'm not a pompous magistrate that needs his ego fluffed," He replied to the woman, his tone firm as he walked along, hating that he had to have a matter of simple survival pointed out to him by someone else because he could practically hear his father berating him for his softness, that he'd allowed himself to become weak. His hands clenched into tight fists behind his back as they continued to walk. "Address me as Lieutenant or more informally as LT,"

He took a beat and a breath before looking back to Andrea. "You haven't annoyed me Ensign, my typical method of dealing with my condition is to engage in combat on the holodeck, though that hasn't helped."

“Lieutenant may I ask, if combat hasn’t helped with your...condition, then what will help?” Andrea looked at Sovas curiously.

Sovas' eyes narrowed at her question, gaze lowering towards the ground while they walked, stopping at the turbolift, calling it. "A violent purging is one way of solving my current issue, the other involves intercourse, which I have my own issues about because of my childhood."

Andrea nodded. “I see. You need say no more Lieutenant, it isn’t my place to pry into your private matters.” She offered a smile. “If there’s anything I can do...” She paused. “Would a holodeck recreation help with your...predicament?”

"I'm not certain if a holographic recreation would work, my father was quite adamant that his heir wouldn't be caught rutting like an animal," He paused and held up a hand, smirking just a little. "I know, there are slaves and sexual activity is quite common in the fleet, it more of accepting it on my own terms since my father wanted to ensure that I was dedicated to the Empire even more than a pure Terran would be because of my mixed heritage."

Andrea nodded. “I can understand that, I haven’t been with anyone since I was a victim of physical, mental and sexual abuse. To be honest your the first man I’ve put any true trust in since then.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m not afraid of you Lieutenant, if you were going to harm me you would have back there.”

The doors of the turbolift opened as Sovas stepped on with Andrea, he didn't know what to make of this sense of trust that the Terran woman had placed in him for seemingly no reason beside the devil you know, which wasn't something that made an entire amount of sense to the halfblood especially given her background that she had just revealed to him. "Deck Five," He called out as the lift began moving he watched the lights of the corridor outside.

"I didn't harm you back in the corridor because I don't commit violence without a reason," He finally spoke to Andrea once more while letting out a slow breath to center himself while feeling his unwanted guest sifting and sorting through his memories for more as he lowered his head to give a deep, throaty growl. "A Klingon commits violence without reason, justifying it afterwards as act of honor or bravery but its merely an animal lashing out to no purpose other than to gratify its own existence."

"A Terran must be more. They must act with conscious intent and not just through instinct, to do so is to be little better than an animal or an alien." He shared while letting out a deep, heavy sigh while his jaw flexed and his hands were clasped tightly behind his back. "To be an animal or alien means to be led and eventually slaughtered by the hand of a true Terran."

“Are you saying that you expect me to slaughter you if you lose control?” Andrea looked at Sovas curiously. “I would defend myself if I had to, but I don’t think I will. I’ve learned to be a good judge of character since what happened to me.”

"You in particular? No. Just sharing the philosophy my father raised me with...aliens are chattel that must be guide and eventually slaughtered when they no longer serve a purpose." Sovas shared as the lift came to a stop and he moved to leave so he could make his way to sickbay with Andrea in tow.

"I'm not saying that you need to slaughter me but I am at a distinct disadvantage in the universe we live in given my mixed heritage, there are plenty that would prefer I be wearing a collar and subservient to my Terran betters despite the Emperor's decree."

“There are other half Terrans onboard ship Sovas. Our Chief Discipline Inspection Officer for one, you’re not the only mixed heritage Officer.”

"I know but that doesn't change that fact of Terran prejudices, no decree can do that," He frowned and silently pondered how best to expression his feeling since his experience wouldn't have been something that she necessarily would have. "A half Terran must work doubly hard to prove ourselves in the eyes of our Terran peers because we are tainted by alien blood, what might be a small misstep for you as a pure Terran could be a much more severe reprimand for someone like me or our Discipline Officer simply because of the prejudice of our perceived weakness and the Terran mindset places pure Terrans as the pinnacle of evolution, half-bloods are tolerated because their pure Emperor told them to see the Terran blood be we are all taught that the alien must be made to serve as that is their natural place and so being of mixed heritage places one in a position where law dictates that we are to be seen as Terran depending on how much pure Terran blood we have, but tradition dictates that we are to be treated as lesser because of our alien blood."

"Its a careful balancing act that we must maintain or suffer consequences of prejudice."

“You’re right” Andrea nodded. “I’ve seen it happen enough times, that’s why I try not to show prejudice. I may be Terran but I’m not a monster. That’s why I won’t treat you, or Callie, or anyone else that way. Call me weak but that’s who I am. Some would kill to move up the ladder, but I’d prefer to earn that right.”

"While I share your sentiment, merit does not always mean that the most qualified earns their place." He replied as they drew closer to Sickbay as he paused and looked to Andrea. "It has been a pleasant conversation with you Lieutenant, I'll make my way from here."

Andrea nodded. “Aye Sir, I’ll get back to work.” She nodded politely and headed on her way.

OFF